“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.” – John Wooden
How do you respond when you’re criticized? What do you do when you come up against an obstacle? Do you have the ability to bounce back from failure?
Whether the issue is personal or professional, how you answer to your critics, analyze your faults and create a new strategic plan of action says a lot about your personality.
Does failure – at your job or in your relationship – prompt you to do (or not do) any of the following?
Your bark and your bite are lethal. Instead of honestly assessing yourself from an objective point of view, failure or criticism puts you on the offensive. This is a dominant trait, and maybe you exhibit other signs of this personality type as well. In fact, it doesn’t matter if the failure is real or fabricated – sometimes you create obstacles or problems just so you can actively fight against them.
Do you fear failure? Do you have a fear of not being liked? Do you have a fear of being misunderstood?
While your conscious mind may scoff and adamantly say no, these fears drive the influencer personality type away from all problems, failures and criticisms at a high speed. Avoidance is your coping mechanism.
The same tactics are used by submissive personalities. They only deal with problems when they absolutely have to, no sooner.
Though they don’t run away from problems, the compliant personality feeds off of a failure in an unhealthy way. Instead of processing the failure, assessing its accuracy and forming a strategy to overcome problems of a similar nature in the future, the compliant personality struggles to come to terms with the issue.
They are stuck in the processing phase, recognizing the problem, but never moving on. They are thinkers. They question the obstacle from all angles. This is an exercise that appeals to the compliant, fear-motivated personality type, and they could begin to waste away before they come to the end of their research and rumination.
How Knowing Your Authentic Self Helps You Overcome Failure
When you’re able to separate what you’ve done from who you are, failure no longer has the power to compel you to attack in anger, run away in fear, or waste away in sorrow.
When you know yourself – know how you think, why you say and do the things you do – you understand yourself. When you understand, the inward criticism is not as harsh.
When you view a failure as a particular instance, one moment in time, it doesn’t have the same power over you.
Knowing your true self helps you develop resiliency, which many experts say is the key to happiness. Resiliency, the ability to cope with life’s ups and downs, is the opposite of depression, according to Peter Kramer, author of “Against Depression.”
Who Are You?
How do you naturally respond to failure? Do you let external criticisms and outward forces dictate your view of yourself? Take our free assessment to learn more about your authentic self.